An author reflects on her midlife experience as childless, focusing on her relationship with her aging Korean parents and the cultural expectations around family. The article details her experiences with her parents, including the disinterment of her grandparents' remains in South Korea, her mother's past as an immigrant, and the author's own career path. It also touches upon the 4B movement in South Korea (refusal of marriage, reproduction, dating, sex) and its brief resurgence in the US, contrasting traditional family structures with chosen paths.
‘Do you have a family?’: midlife with no kids, ageing parents – and no crisis
South KoreaWorldAsia PacificUnited StatesWomenSociety
AI Summary
TL;DR: Key points with love ❤️An author reflects on her midlife experience as childless, focusing on her relationship with her aging Korean parents and the cultural expectations around family. The article details her experiences with her parents, including the disinterment of her grandparents' remains in South Korea, her mother's past as an immigrant, and the author's own career path. It also touches upon the 4B movement in South Korea (refusal of marriage, reproduction, dating, sex) and its brief resurgence in the US, contrasting traditional family structures with chosen paths.
Trending- 1 1988: Seoul Olympics (hotel built).
- 2 2016: 4B movement emerged online.
- 3 2018: Author fired from TV job.
- 4 2022: Yoon Suk Yeol won presidency.
- 5 2023 (Spring): Author visited Montreal.
- 6 2024 (implied): Trump's re-election.
- 7 "A few years ago": Grandparents' graves exhumed.
- 8 "Just before I turned 40": Regular trips to Korea began.
- Shifting societal views on family and reproduction
- Increased focus on elder care for childless individuals
- Personal struggles with identity and aging
- Potential for new forms of artistic expression (e.g., Kid Koala's album)
What: An author's personal reflection on midlife, childlessness, aging parents, and societal expectations of family, intertwined with cultural observations from South Korea and the US, including the 4B movement.
When: 'A few years ago' (grandparents' graves exhumed), 'mid-60s' (uncle and wife's age), 'in my 40s' (author's age), '2016' (4B movement emerged), '2022' (Yoon Suk Yeol's presidency), 'two years later' (Trump's re-election, implying 2024), 'just before I turned 40' (regular trips to Korea began), '2018' (author fired from TV job), 'spring of 2023' (trip to Montreal).
Where: South Korea (Seoul, Itaewon, public and private cemeteries, a temple east of Seoul), United States (author's home, southern California, Washington state, New York City, Montreal, Seattle).
Why: To explore alternative definitions of 'family' and 'midlife success' beyond traditional marriage and reproduction, and to reflect on filial piety, cultural identity, and the pressures faced by childless individuals.
How: Through personal narrative, including anecdotes about family interactions, cultural observations, career changes, and reflections on societal norms and feminist movements like 4B.